Alex Baskin
Your Heartmind
I want you to be sad
I want you to be sad
I want you to be sad
Finding your way through the market
Past the fruit-sellers, the cobblers, the knick-knack hawkers, the astrologers, the money changers, the chai wallahs, the school kids, the nuns, the monks, and the beggars
Shiny saris, shiny shoes, and shiny skin
Skin stretched over an arm
That kind, quiet man's arm
An arm that ends too early
How did he lose it?
You're not supposed to pretend that you're, like,
not affected by seeing dismembered limbs
I want you to be sad
And then I want you to be happy
Now you look over there
Who helped braid that young girl's hair?
Coconut oil and she doesn’t take any shit from anybody
I want you to be afraid
And I want you to be strong
I want you to feel it
No matter what it is
All I wish for is that you're not numb
Whatever you do, just don't sleepwalk
Look, see, acknowledge, know it, note it, honor it,
It's not you
Are you fluent in the languages of your inner voices?
Are you friends with Mara?
What does it mean when you cry?
What does your sorrow sound like?
What does your grief taste like?
What does your loneliness look like?
Have you ever wanted to just scream at the top of your lungs but had nowhere to do it?
What do you do? Do you scream in your head too?
When was your last big, full-bellied laugh?
Can you go to the market, or the temple, or the countryside across the river‑
Can you go there and let anything happen?
Exactly the right moment
Emerald, rolling hills
Fluffy, cotton clouds
Trees in the distance
some green, some gray, so gentle
Ordered lines planted in fields
All of it
The illusion of stillness
Lush, so lush
Places like this actually exist
We ride rented bicycles on narrow paths
through wet, rice paddies
It’s a bit cold
but we’ve brought the right clothes
K gave me a scarf of hers
I carry things for her
in my daypack
Turn onto a road
the occasional car glides by
stay tight on the shoulder
K rides ahead of me
wind sways her high ponytail
Waist-level, potted bushes
placed every few feet
She reaches out
runs her hand through leaves
I’ve brought American music with me
to Taiwan
here
through small, black speakers,
in the basket on this handlebar
Lou Reed sings about heroin
The hills, they keep on rolling
This landscape reminds me
I’m a small part of a whole
Lou says he wishes he was born
a thousand years ago
I know I arrived in this world
at exactly the right moment
I know I have everything I need
I know that
though today will end
though love fades
though confusion’s return is inevitable
this, right now, feels right
Bodh Gaya
They are everywhere and they are squirming
I am
slow hopscotching on the garden path
to avoid committing
caterpillarcide
The abbot looks my way
I wish I knew what he was thinking
this Burmese man of eighty
has lived his whole life
here in India
What must it have been like?
I want to look inside everyone
gobble up everything
have it all
but I need to appreciate
the things I can't know
Hopefully, another monk once told me,
I'm causing less harm now
than I did before
I bow to the abbot
He waves
Turning away, he walks on
and I do too
A caterpillar is flattened
beneath my American feet
I'm trying my best here
Alex Baskin
I was first introduced to Buddhist meditation methods by Burmese, Japanese, and Tibetan teachers when I was a college student. Most recently, I’ve been experimenting by combining mettā (loving kindness) meditation with mindfulness of the body. I try to keep my spiritual practice fresh and playful. I rely on Buddhist communities, texts, and traditions not only for teachings on meditation, but also for social-ethical inspiration, for embodied rituals such as chanting and bowing, and for the broader project of meaning-making in my life.
I am a graduate student at Harvard Divinity School and the resident caretaker at Cambridge Insight Meditation Center. I began training as a Community Dharma Leader through Spirit Rock Meditation Center, though the program was cancelled prematurely due to the global coronavirus pandemic. I have worked as a teaching assistant with a Buddhist studies semester-abroad program in Bodh Gaya, India. I also completed a yearlong, in-house fellowship at the Insight Meditation Society in Barre, MA. I regularly volunteer as a mentor with meditation retreats for teenagers. I love to dance. This is my debut publication.
More on Alex Baskin’s work can be found on our Links page.
